Ghost (1990) - Communing with the Spirits Can Cause Constipation, Just Ask Oda Mae.

 

Molly Jensen (talking to Oda Mae Brown): "Are you alright, Oda Mae?"

Oda Mae (talking to Molly): "I'm fine. I always start to feel a little constipated whenever the spirits start to commune with me."

King of the Hill - When Joseph and Minh Made Out

Joseph Finally Had the Chance to Make His Move...

Olive Osmond VS. Katherine Jackson - Olive Reveals Katherine's "Motherly" Exploits.

 

Olive Osmond Vs. Katherine Jackson: The Bad Mother of the Year Award.

Katherine (talking to Olive Osmond): "Olive, I know you had something to do with this little online meme.  Why did you do it?"

Olive (talking to Katherine Jackson): "It's my duty to tell the truth, Kate. The public deserves to know the truth."

Katherine (crying aloud): "I just can't win for losing, can I? I just can't compete with Olive Osmond."

A Young Katherine Jackson VS. A Young Olive Osmond - Rivals About the Ways of Motherhood

A Young Katherine Jackson and Olive Osmond, Always At Loggerheads.

Katherine Jackson (talking to Olive Osmond): "I'm likely to be voted 'Mother of the Year' one day.  I mean, come on, just look at this face.  I'm gonna have me the most beautiful babies someday."

Olive Osmond (talking to Katherine Jackson): "No, Katherine. You look too immodest. You're too vain, and you're not at all humble. A simply dressed girl, a pretty 'Plain Jane'; a humble, modest girl is what the people want.  My children will be simple, modest folk, even if they end up rich. After all, that's the Mormon way. That is how I want people to think of me if I ever become 'Mother of the Year'; I want to be thought of as the simple, loving, modest mom."

Janet, La Toya, Or Michael?

Are Janet and La Toya Really Just Michael Jackson In Drag, Inquiring Minds Want To Know.

 

     La Toya (whispering to Janet): "Don't worry, Jan.  People stop me everywhere I go and accuse me of just being Michael in drag, too. All the time.

Joh'Vonnie and La Toya Jackson - A Tale of Two Bitchy Sisters

Joh'Vonnie and La Toya Jackson: Bitchin' Sisters

Joh'Vonnie Jackson (thinking to herself): "La Toya thinks she's such hot shit.  I'm the daughter that Joseph Jackson really loves. Suck it up, bitch!"

La Toya Jackson (thinking to herself about Joh'Vonnie): "Joh'Vonnie thinks she's such hot shit.  She may have been the one who was allowed to call Joseph "Daddy" growing up, but who's the one who ended up with the singing career, Jovie? Not you!
 

Disney's Lizzie McGuire - Jo McGuire Reveals to Her Daughter What She Really Did With Baby Matt.

 

Jo McGuire (talking to Lizzie): "Lizzie, you're right.  Matt wasn't actually kidnapped at the yard sale when you were five. Matt was getting annoying with his constant whining, and your father and I were sick of having to get up at all hours of the night to either feed him or to change his diaper; he kept your dad and I up all night, so I just threw him to the neighbor's dog."

Disney's Lizzie McGuire - It Takes Two...According to Andie and Kate, But Not To Lizzie

 

Kate (talking to Lizzie who is off-screen): "Sometimes it takes two to tango, McGuire.  Andie thought that I was a better role model than you, and everyone else agrees with us. You live and learn."

Lizzie (talking to Kate): "Well, it doesn't take two to tell you that having a little Mini-Me following you around all day can get annoying very quickly.  That's why I told Andie to go take a hike.  Sooner or later, you'll tire of your little Barbie clone having her nose constantly up your skirt.  Oh, and by the way, that's a really bad hairdo.  Did you two mug a couple of clowns for their wigs on your way to school today?"  

Disney's Lizzie McGuire - Angel Lieberman Wishes She Were Livin' Large Like Lizzie.

Angel Lieberman (talking to Lizzie): "...And you, Lizzie McGuire, are never going to live large! 

                                       Five Years Later... 

Lizzie (thinking to herself about Angel's words): "'You, Lizzie McGuire, are never going to live large.' Except...now I kind of am, Angel.

Disney's Lizzie McGuire - Morticia Addams is no match for Lizzie.

 

Lizzie (talking to herself):  "Morticia Addams, eat your heart out."

Disney's Lizzie McGuire - Lay off the Mary Jane, Lizzie.

 

Lizzie (talking to Miranda who is offscreen):  This is my scary mindless zombie face, Miranda.  Perfect for Halloween, huh?

Kate (talking to Lizzie):  "Oh, Lizzie, stop it.  Everyone knows that face is a sign that you've been smoking too much Mary Jane.

Disney's Lizzie McGuire - Miranda Stands Up to the Kate Sanders Empire

 

Kate Sanders (talking to Miranda Sanchez): "Alright, Sanchez. I know it was you.  You just wait, Miranda.  I'm going to get you!"

Miranda Sanchez (talking to Kate Sanders): "Oh, really?  Bring it on, Sanders.  My girl Lizzie's got my back.

Disney's Lizzie McGuire - Relieving Childhood Nostalgia Can Be Both Fun and Terrifying

Lizzie and Miranda couldn't wait to get home to relive some nostalgia by watching their favorite TV show when they were kids, though it wasn't quite what they remembered, it was much better:

Disney's Lizzie McGuire - HELP US FIND MIRANDA, OUR MISSING DOG!

                                          

                                      MISSING DOG:

ANSWERS TO MIRANDA ISABELLA SANCHEZ.

 IF FOUND, PLEASE CONTACT HER OWNER, ELIZABETH BROOKE "LIZZIE" MCGUIRE, BY PHONE NUMBER AT 1-800-D-I-Z-Z-Y-L-I-Z-Z-I-E.  SHE'S VERY CONCERNED AND MISSING HER BELOVED PET TERRIBLY; OR, IF YOU HAVE FOUND THE DOG, YOU CAN RETURN MIRANDA TO LIZZIE IN PERSON AT LIZZIE'S HOME ADDRESS. LIZZIE MCGUIRE'S HOME ADDRESS IS LOCATED AT 1040 KLUTZY LANE, WACKOTOWN, NEW YORK, USA.